Thursday, May 17, 2012

This is not a post on penis printed leggings.

But its cool man, you can still view the leggings right here. And better yet they can be yours for about $150.00. You should know they also are available in shiny. 
Now moving on, we are here to discuss Lauren Cheek founder of Dapper Dicks. He makes costumes for penises. Now If you want to dress up a dick, I say go for it. And I know if these were still available for purchase, poor Eddie wouldn't stand a chance. Val would have an epic battle. Toe Town & Toeville unite for once against Evil Cowboy Cock. We all know this to be a fact.

Yes, this is Valerie's foot. Now it makes more sense, yes?

But i am a bit grumpy this morning & I really don't like this guy. After this quick video, I have a few points to touch on.

1. This fucker is creepy.

2. How is that hat really going to stay on? I would rather stick a dick into a stocking & pretend its robbing a bank.

3. The sign behind him reads "Designer Wear For Down There". Which makes me think "The mere fact you call it pop pop shows me your just not ready".

4. "Designed for foreplay."  Really?  Because I think I would just say "What the fuck is on your dick? You look ridiculous,  put that fucking thing away now & bring me my whip!"

5. "Girls like to play with dolls and you get some sex out of it". See #1

6. OK can't lie here, I would totally watch a penis puppet show.

7. I am oddly disappointed I can't get Valerie a one size fits all cowboy cock outfit.

8. Pause the video at 1:07

9. Lets make safety & the well dressed dick coincide.  Listen up condom makers, some people want their dick to be all fancy like and wear clothes. Get on that shit.
      *What do we want?
      * Fancier condoms!
      * When do we want them?
      * NOW!

10. Go back and read 9 as if it was Trey Parker or Matt Stone talking. It is much funnier that way.

1 comment:

  1. if they can make my penis look like abraham lincoln(beard, hat,the works), then we have a deal!!!