Wednesday, January 25, 2012

Things You Can’t Un-see: Clown Porn

Promise me one thing...even if the curiosity is almost too much to bear... swear to me right here and now that you will never EVEREVEREVEREVEREVER Google the words “clown porn”. Not even as a joke... not even as a “I bet it doesn’t exist and nothing will come up. I WILL DEFEAT YOU GOOGLE!!” shot in the dark. Because, let me tell you somethings… somethings you really can’t un-see. Let’s discuss, shall we?

Ok.. Now, it could be that my phobia of clowns taking over. But I just want to let you know that I am an avid horror movie watcher. I love being scared! Also, I love some weird fucked up porn movies. Anything that ends with a human head being popped off post cum to reveal an octopus is ok by me. That’s movie magic! That’s original! But clown porn?? No thanks.. I think I’ll pass.

Still, my curiosity got the best of me, and I went against my better judgment. I googled. If I could go back in time and undo it, I would. Gods helped me.. I googled Clown Porn. Have you ever seen a rubber chicken being rubbed on a pair of fake breasts? Have you ever seen a horrible clown make his “O” face? These are the things that will keep you up at night. I think clowns should not be anatomically correct. Like Ken dolls and David Hasselhoff..

You may be thinking: “I bet when the makeup smears a little bit, it’s not so bad. Just like overly done wannabe Hollywood starlets..” Let me assure you, my friend, this is not the case. By the way, did you know that hot girls dressed as clowns are not very hot at all? It’s like an ugly chick with a banging body. You still have to put the bag over her head to make it a worthwhile event.

Did you know that there is a group of people that you could hire to appear at your event to provide clown eroticism?!? I do now.. And this new found knowledge has made me a bit fearful of public situations… I think I’m gonna go sit in my closet for a while.. and.. cry..



Sunday, January 15, 2012

Sex after the Zombie Apocalypse

You didn’t really think about that did you? I mean, at first, you won’t. I doubt anyone will. Sex is the last thing on the mind after you just watched your Grandma claw her way out of her casket and bite into the head of Uncle Johnny. Sure.. There may be in incident now and then when it comes to mind. I know how the blood gets pumping after a particular exhilarating zombie chase. You, a hoard of now debrained zombies, the heat of battle… Things happen.

But lets be honest.. Nothing gets the population going like surviving a horrid event. Sooner or later, sexy time will come to mind. But how? With whom? There will be no bar crawling, no You’ll have to meet people in the field.. or.. rely on yourself. And lets face it. Banging some dude you just saved from a couple of stripper zombies probably isn’t the best idea. Not unless you want him following you around like a little puppy. This is exactly why you’ll want to keep a vibrator among your survival items. Do the research now, people! Because when the day comes, you wont have much time to stop at your local adult store. In fact, I doubt you would want to visit there anyway. The gross zombies you may come across there aren’t worth it. Not to mention that the selection would probably be dismal.

Like a good Zombie Apocalypse Survivor, you are going to want to plan ahead of time. Good planning is the key to survival.. You’ll want something that’s not a battery hog.. Something quiet but fun. And, if at all possible, something that can double as a weapon. Cuz, lets be honest, you never know…



Wednesday, January 11, 2012

An Introduction: This blog will be an eclectic one.

We are Nicole & Valerie. Most of you at this point already know this because you know us. What you may or may not know is, we have decided to start our own at home sex toy party business called Purr Purr Pussycat.
After many disappointments in stores and other at home parties we figured the only logical thing to do is design a new kind of at home party. Parties with a "health first" mind set (no crappy toys) and educational aspect. A party that caters to our clients rather the other way around.
Rather then sticking to the normal sex toy party hum drum of vanilla only, Purr Purr Pussycat will offer fetish oriented parties as well. Or you can have a vanilla party with a fetish segment. You decide, we offer many different flavors.
We thought a blog would be a useful way to keep in touch with clients & keep you posted on all kinds of information. We will be posting on all the hot topics, the new cutest video ever of a porcupine eating corn, a research study on masturbating in your sleep and everything in between. We will have our facebook page up & running soon. If you have a question or you want us to post about something, messages us & let us know. Suggestions are always welcome. So stay tuned and tell your friends, we hope you enjoy reading it as much as we enjoy posting.